Recently, I was talking with someone who was applying for a leadership role in the field of aging services. While the individual was trying to grow their understanding of the work we do, they were trying to apply a commodity mindset, a commercial mindset to this kind of work and no matter how many ways I tried to re-explain and redefine, the concept that it is about individuals and their wellbeing just never seemed to penetrate. The work we do is not about things, it is not about numbers, it is about lives. It does not, I guess, get any more basic than that.

I’ve thought about that conversation a few times in recent weeks. I’ve thought about my belief that it is not just aging services as a field that is dependent upon relationships with human beings, rather it is leadership itself. For the most part, none of the work that we do is fully solitary. We are connected and interconnected and, while we know it, we don’t always remember that it is primary and that all else is secondary.

Effectively leading people, managing them, working with others requires sincerity. It requires us to mean what we say and to do so with honesty. It requires focus, tuning into the conversation and the interaction. And it involves real caring about the individuals. That is not to say that we have the ability to build a personal relationship with everyone who works for or with us. That’s not feasible. But it is to say that when those interactions occur, we should bring our full selves to them.

Not easy I know. Not easy when we are torn in a million directions with schedules that are overfilled and sometimes overwhelming. But what I am suggesting is that we try, for that moment, to really tune in, that we try to take a breath and remember that it is the person that matters most. Our moment to pay attention, to be fully present, to acknowledge and even to thank, can make, I think, all the difference.